Sleeveless Dresses and Shirts

Summertime... and the dresses are sleeveless

Fish are jumping... blood pressure is high

Enough. From the title you clearly understand this is a serious post. When women of a certain age shop (I’ve never been a man of a certain age, shopping or otherwise, so forgive my lack of inclusion), they… we are magnetically drawn to look at the sleeves on dresses and blouses. This is a must.

I don't want to speak for you - perhaps you are so confident that this post will not resonate with your insecurities. Lucky you. For me, when I am in a dressing room trying on a sleeveless dress or shirt, even before I look at my middle section straining the lower buttons, I stare at the arms... my arms, my waving, jiggling arms. I lift my arms, check for movement, sometimes, just for laughs, I give that excess skin a little push and watch it swing. I assess severity; I have visions of flying Shar-Peis, and then resignedly lower those same arms to my sides. Sigh.

I remember the days when sleeveless dresses, halters, heels and miniskirts were just items of clothing, not an indictment. I threw them on. As long as the mini skirt covered my panties, I was good to go. Now, standing in the dressing room, staring in the mirror, my final thoughts roam to whether a sweater or jacket can cover this sleeveless garment. Then, it's not my mother's voice I hear - it is the collective voices of all our daughters groaning, "Ooooh mom,"

I wiggle it off my body and hang it on the hook marked “Another Day” which should be labeled "Never in a Gazillion Years".

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